pyrex-vision:

aint no condoms in my wallet girl those are ramen noodle flavor packets 

(Source: pyrexvisean, via dietchola)

lolzpicx:

You’re standing there like:

But when they leave you’re like:

(Source: best-of-text-posts, via hollabrownppl)

populardad:

there is a difference between people who are smart and people who get good grades

(via hollabrownppl)

mew-squared:

• In 2009, a man married a video game character
• In 2007, a woman married the Eiffel Tower
• In 2008, a man married a life-sized doll
• Also in 2009, a woman married a roller coaster
• And in 2005, a woman married a dolphin

please explain to me why people still say that gays shouldn’t be able to be married to preserve the sanctity of marriage

(via book-0f-eli)

dumpsterfetus:

trying to lower a pokemon’s HP so you can catch it but you get a critical hit and it faints

(via dietchola)

whorville:

I don’t care about your follower count, what’s your sperm count

(via jesussbabymomma)

so my dad bought me laxatives…..